Using a Sober Companion for Accountability



Have you been told that accountability is the key to your recovery, all the while watching hypocrisy rear its ugly head? Well, accountability is an extremely important step in recovery, but hypocrisy always runs rampant in the addictions industry and recovery community to a point where it can cripple a recovering drug addict’s growth in recovery.

So let’s begin with accountability and discuss why this is such an important step in recovery and then we will use an example of an extremely important person in the sports industry that preached accountability for four decades during his career but when it was time for him to take accountability he ran the other way. Accountability is basically owning the negative actions and consequences that go hand-in-hand with an active addiction. Taking accountability is looking inward for solutions to improving your lifestyle instead of looking outward to blame others for your misfortunes. When we are trying to get clean and sober and stay clean and sober we waste so much time blaming others instead of looking inward at the real person to blame and beginning a long tedious process towards sobriety and recovery.

The sooner we acknowledge that we are to blame for our path of destruction during our drug use, the sooner we can begin to dig ourselves out properly. We really have to watch out for hypocrisy when we are looking upward to those who have succeeded in getting clean and sober and staying clean and sober because if we are not careful, hypocrisy can lead us right back into an active addiction.

I want to use an example of a Major League Baseball coach who refused to take accountability for his actions. Coach Tony La Russa, who’s major league baseball career spanned over multiple decades, always preached accountability and was a bit of a hard nosed authoritarian when it came to following the rules and discipline. This is why the baseball community was completely shocked by the video that surfaced last week of a drunken Tony La Russa slurring while telling a local police officer that he should “know who he was” and that he was “one of those Hall of Famer guys”.

First of all, the officer did not appear to know who Tony La Russa was and was more concerned with how intoxicated this man was behind the steering wheel of an automobile. But more importantly, Tony La Russa, who was a strict authoritarian, was trying to convince the police officer to let him go and convince him that he did nothing wrong and to take his Hall of Fame status as reason to do so. Coach Tony La Russa was not in recovery and has never been in trouble with the law, however, his incident is a true example of not taking accountability for an issue that you caused that could have had a tragic ending for La Russa or an innocent driver on the roads that evening.

Had he had a sober coach, or a recovery coach or even a sober companion he would be working on accountability and staying sober. The drug and alcohol treatment industry would have held him accountable and taught him accountability.

Accountability is one of the most important pieces to getting clean and sober and staying clean and sober and we discuss accountability here at The Addictions Coach and the Addictions Academy. So whether you are a struggling drug addict or you are on the flipside and are wanting to help struggling drug addicts in recovery you can contact us here or and we can assist you at 800 706 0318 ext 2

Why is the Addiction Treatment Success Rate Higher with a Sober Companion?

Why is the Addiction Treatment Success Rate Higher with a Sober Companion?

10/16/2020 by Chris Cobb

sober companion

I’ve been here, I’ve been there, I’ve been everywhere, man. Every time I fell off, all the king’s judges and all the king’s jails couldn’t put me together again. Neither could the drug and alcohol treatment centers, the anger management teacher who taught me how to hold my hand above my head and breath when I get mad (pretty sure the class caused me even more anger), or the crooked sober living directors who preached to me the things they were doing that I shouldn’t do. I was a 12 stepper against my own will. Even though I learned how to get to the underlying issues that seemingly caused me to destroy my life with drugs and alcohol in the first place, it was one of the most unnecessarily depressing and difficult times of my entire life. Sobriety alongside with misery made me sometimes wonder what the point of being sober even is. I was working my ass of and was still broke, I was keeping my side of the street clean but still being accused of doing the opposite. I’ve managed to roll up on almost 3 years sober so far, despite my self-proclaimed hardship that most people will probably think is just complaining (maybe it is, I’m still far from a cure). If I would have had someone to help me out when I really couldn’t deal with even my sponsor, maybe it wouldn’t have been such a bad experience for me. Even though I’ve pulled through to the point where I am away from all the ruckus and still sober, I’ve seen far too many people get kicked out of a so-called “recovery” program for not paying rent, fraternizing, staying out past curfew and so on, and the first thing they wind up doing is blaming someone else and running out to get high, drunk, in jail, or dead. So, what if there was something or someone better fitted for these transitional situations? A Sober Companion perhaps? I believe whole-heartedly that with a Sober Companion, Addiction Treatment such as inpatient treatment, outpatient treatment, even when mental health and drug addiction coincide in a client / patient, would have a much higher success rate. Why do I feel this way? Well let’s get to it. Here are 3 reasons I just rambled to this point, but you’re still reading, so might as well finish.


  1. There for you no matter what:

Unlike that sponsor that dropped you because you went against their wishes and found a girlfriend or boyfriend in less than the year they “suggested”, or the sober living house owner who kicked you to the curb for eating someone else’s hamburger helper, your Sober Companion still has your back. He / she will still work with you, walk you through with their professional training and personal experience, and get you where you need to go if you don’t have a way. You have someone to talk to instead of going back out alone again.


  1. You don’t have to start over with everything again:

Most people including me, at one time or another, leave or get kicked out of sober living, or feel judged in an AA or NA meeting. And all they hear when they try to say something about it is “it’s your fault for taking it personally”, as if you’re supposed to be a robot with no emotions or reflexes. So now what? You feel like you have no one, even the programs put in place to help folks like you and myself have metaphorically chased you out with torches. Well I’ll tell you. Relapse. Jail. Hospitals. Institutions. Loss, death, you name it. With a Sober Companion, that one person who’s got your back no matter what, so much turmoil could be easily avoided. You’ve got someone to help you through this tough situation when it gets as tough as it can get. Someone to lift you up and motivate you, to teach you your self-worth. So you don’t have to go back to drinking and drugs. You don’t have to go back to jail, you don’t have to lose it all again.



  1. Proper Planning:

Say all the above happens and you feel cornered, lost. This is where having a Sober Companion can save your life, by having many tools at your disposal, despite the tools and resources that have been taken away from you over ridiculous circumstances. Get with your Sober Companion and make a plan. Even if it’s taking baby steps, like going to a meeting, and moving forward from there. Your Sober Companion has been where you are, found what worked for them, and made it through. Now you have someone to pull you up right when you feel at your lowest. Make a plan, find a new way. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. You’ve got a Sober Companion by your side to help you through it all.


If you are in need of a stress free, non-judgmental experience on your road to recovery, I highly recommend a Sober Companion. If you’d like to learn how to become a Sober Companion and help others overcome struggles similar to your own in past addictions, contact Dr. Cali Estes (The Addictions Coach) and The Addictions Academy at 800.706.0318 ext. 2, or visit their website –


4 Attributes to Possess in Order to Create an Incredible Recovery Coaching Practice

4 Attributes to Possess in Order to Create an Incredible Recovery Coaching Practice


Recovery Coach Training


So you’ve made it. You’re a Recovery Coach, and you have quite the roster of clients rolling. But what makes you stand out from the rest? The other addictions coaches / counselors? There are two things you need to be great at in order to stand out: coaching, and business. Many coaches fall short with the former or latter. Here are 4 ways to get and give the most from your Recovery Coaching Practice.




1. Internet / Social Media Presence:
When potential clients see that you are official, they are more likely to reach out. Social Media is one of the largest and most accessible forms of communication and promotion for businesses these days. Not only social media, but a website of your own that showcases your talents, your work, your professionalism and experience.

2. Credentials:
With today’s vast amount of Recovery Coaches and access to alternatives to traditional treatments, those seeking recovery from any addiction have more choices than ever before. With the available National Certifications from The Addictions Academy, as well as State Certifications and alternative disciplines and educational pathways such as Intervention, Anger Management and Family Recovery Coaching, you are more marketable.

3. Networking:
Surround yourself with individuals of great merit, and spread the word about your skill. Let them know you are taking referrals. Contact those who work with similar clientele: Mental health therapists, doctors, treatment centers, legal support specialists, detoxes, and others, including other coaches alike. A good contact refers back and forth, and you will build gradual credibility. Build a referral base and keep your lines of communication with them open.

4. A Coach of Your Own:
A Recovery Coach comes to know what is best for their client, so they must know what’s best for themselves. A coach of their own. It is vitally important that you have someone on your side to bounce ideas for marketing, business and clinical supervision to handle the challenges that arise with some clients. Teamwork at its best, and more proof that everyone can utilize a coach in virtually every aspect of life.

At The Addictions Academy we can assist you with all that is mentioned above. We are the only National Provider of Addictions Coaching classes, including the International Master Addiction Coach Certification that encompasses ten (10) different types of addictions: drug and alcohol, gambling and gaming, food addictions, and more! This includes 25 hours of supervision and full marketing program. We can mentor you, assist you with marketing, website development and becoming the best Addiction Coach you can be. or call us at 1.800.706.0318 ext. 2

5 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Your Child Has an Addiction Problem

5 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Your Child Has an Addiction Problem


There is nothing that parents wouldn’t do for their children, and perhaps no other instance is this saying put to the test better than when the latter are faced with addiction or substance abuse problems. As a parent, you may feel shocked or surprised at discovering that your child is deep into drugs or alcohol. You may also feel ashamed and concerned about your family’s reputation in society or in your community. Finally, you may feel guilt and self-pity, and reprimand yourself for allowing such a situation to happen.

All of these are normal reactions to finding out that your teenager is into substance abuse, because it is a serious and life-altering situation indeed. However, this is also the time for you to keep your wits together and to act in the best interest of your child. Keep in mind that it is difficult enough for an individual to struggle under addiction, so you need utmost care in dealing with the situation and to extend the right kind of help. Here are 5 things that you shouldn’t do when your child has an addiction problem:

Don’t blame or shame. “How could you do this?” or “How did this happen?” is an immediate thought of any person toward a loved one who has fallen into addiction or substance abuse. While this may be a normal reaction of anyone trying to make sense of the situation, it is not helpful to the individual undergoing the addiction as it will make negative feelings worse. Keep in mind that substance abuse is usually already kept a secret by the individual with substance use disorder because they are aware of the detrimental impact the situation may have on their families.

Placing blame on the person or inducing guilt simply pushes them farther away from loved ones and from the potential help that they may provide. Rather than alienating them, this is a time to reassure the individual that they are loved, respected, and acknowledged despite what they have done. A person experiencing an addiction problem requires validation of their self-worth.

Don’t take the cudgels. On the other hand, as a parent, you may feel the instinct to protect your child at all costs. This may also be unhelpful as it shields them from the repercussions of their actions. While it may be difficult for you to see your child suffer, it is important that they don’t just go scot-free. Facing the consequences of addiction and the lawless activities that it may engender teaches the child responsibility and accountability. Keeping your child in a bubble simply keeps them out of touch with reality and unaware of the negative effects of their actions. In turn, it may even encourage the addictive behavior because they don’t see anything wrong with it.

Don’t call the shots. Another instinct of parents is to act on behalf of their child or to force them into doing what they think is right. Most of the time, this struggle is evident in the process of placing the individual into rehab. As the saying goes, you may lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. The challenge in having an individual undergo rehab is to be able to illustrate the benefits and the positive outcome of the experience. Offer rehab as an opportunity to get better. Coercing the person may only make them comply to please everyone but not internalize the process for long-term recovery. This places them at risk of relapse later on. Engaging your child in a dialogue is important to communicate love and concern, while at the same time offering rehab as a valuable chance to turn their life around. A person with substance use disorder is more likely to resist or rebel in a situation where they feel they are not being heard or respected.

Don’t be a know-it-all. Part of being careful not to exert unnecessary pressure upon your child is not to act as if you know everything. Addiction is a complex health and mental condition that requires a lot of knowledge and understanding. That is why the first step you should do to support someone in sobriety is to seek professional help. Medical and healthcare experts are in the best position to deal with the situation and to guide you on the proper steps toward the recovery of your child. Don’t assume things or act on speculation.

Don’t be impatient. Above all, give your child time to recover. Impatience about the progress of their recovery only reinforces feelings of guilt or shame, and it may even serve as an obstacle to recovery. In fact, full recovery from addiction or substance abuse is a whole different journey in itself. Resisting temptation and going against relapse will be a long-term struggle. You need to express your continuing support for your child on this life-long challenge.

There may be a lot of well-meaning friends or loved ones who will give you unsolicited advice, but make sure to go only with those that are in line with proven techniques and protocols. If you truly care for the welfare of your child, always think twice before reacting and know the right things to say and do that will not further worsen the situation.

Parents, family members, and loved ones of a child suffering with an addiction, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!  Our elite team is here for YOU!  Check out all we offer at The Addictions Coach or call us today, at 1.800.706.0318 ext 1

Reviews of The Addictions Academy and Reviews of Dr. Cali Estes

Reviews of The Addictions Academy and Dr. Cali Estes teaching classes for addiction studies, including recovery coaching, intervention, counselor, and more. Thank you to the University of Texas Health (UT Health ) for inviting me as guest faculty for our case management training class. It was a pleasure to be a guest as faculty for the psychiatry and psychology departments. I appreciate The Addictions Academy reviews from Aaron and the class below. It was great as a faculty member to step in and have a great, fun class.

“I love teaching when I have a fun class that wants to learn and can be very interactive. My passion is teaching clinicians and therapists new ways of thinking and how to optimize their time and strengths in their profession,” Dr. Cali Estes said. “I have taught large groups and small groups of therapists and others around the globe and teaching for University of Texas health was a lot of fun”.

UT Health

The Addictions Academy Reviews:

“Your case management training had a lot of great information and the class seemed to like it as well. We will have you back for future classes.”

Thank you,

Aaron Anaya – Project Coordinator, Sr.

Project Coordinator, Sr.

UT Health San Antonio – Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences

University Plaza

7526 Louis Pasteur, Suite 112

San Antonio, Texas 78229



The Addictions Academy Reviews

The Addictions Academy Reviews and  Dr.  Cali Estes Reviews of Opiate Use Disorder Training for the state of Nebraska


Cali, Your presentation style was captivating as well as content-rich. The five hours seemed very daunting at 8:45 a.m. when it finally registered on me that the training was that long. Five hours went by so quickly, I could have listened to a couple of hours more.  I really enjoyed it. I will ask Lindsey to invite me to any other presentations or training sessions, you host.

BettyJeanBettyJean Usher-Tate, Ph.D.,

CLSSYBStatistical Analyst III, Division of Behavioral Health

Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services

OFFICE: 402-471-7797   EMAIL:

UT Health

The Addictions Academy reviews are below from the State of Nebraska Training

My name is Terrill Jacobsen and I just wanted to say how much I appreciate your presentation today and how insightful I found it. I am a Family Peer Support Specialist for Families CARE In Kearney But have no self-experience with addictions of my own.  I identify very strongly with your story and am a spouse to a recovering long term Addict, I applaud you for sharing your story with all of us. I have often struggled to understand the whys and what for of my Husband addictions and it had led me to a place of self-doubt and struggle. The “sugar with holding” example is the best I have ever heard and goes a long way to describing what they go through in daily life. I am very interested in your Book and would love to have a copy, please let me know how I can obtain one? I think sharing this with the families I peer support would be such a great tool. So many are truly crushed when they find out about a loved one’s addiction and they feel so alone. Thank you so very much for sharing your wisdom and amazing knowledge!


Terrill Jacobsen, CPSS

Family Peer Support Specialist

Families Care

4111 4th Ave. Ste. 2

Kearney, Ne. 68845

Hi Cali,

That was an excellent OUD training today.  Thanks so much for all of the information you shared and for the work you do to help educate, treat, prevent and support recovery.  I would be interested in the book you referenced as well as more information on the supplement kits you offer, if possible.

Before I began my position with the state, I started the only Parents of Addicted Loved Ones (PAL’s) support group here in Nebraska almost 3 years ago.  I would love to be able to share more information about the different support and education you offer for consumers and their loved ones as appropriate and also with the group of folks I work with directly.

Have a great week Cali.

Brenda Moes | DHHS Behavioral Health Consumer Affairs Program Administrator


Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services

OFFICE: 402-471-7721

next one


CBS News Reports: The Addictions Academy to Offer Professional Prison Reentry Coach Certification

The Addictions Academy Now Offers a New and Unique Professional Prison Reentry Coach Certification and Training Program to Help Recently Released Individuals Successfully Reenter Society

Thursday, October 22nd 2020, 12:06 PM PDT

Dr. Cali Estes, The Addictions Coach and Founder of The Addictions Academy confirmed they have a unique program designed to offer training allowing the new Certified Prison Reentry Coach to help offenders reintegrate into society after serving jail and federal time.

A Certified Prison Reentry Coach will be trained, insured, and able to coach a client back into a valued member of their community.

Dr. Estes said, “We are missing a golden opportunity in many cases, a lot of former inmates are left to fend for themselves when released and find they don’t have the tools or skills to cope with life outside the prison walls.”

“Too many of these individuals end up back inside, when they can become valued members of society. They just need some guidance and our reform system isn’t providing what they need very often.”

An Addictions Academy Certified Prison Reentry Coach helps offenders return to society by coaching them on many aspects of life in the free world. These include financial, physical, nutrition, mental, and other aspects of their life that may be new, or may have changed drastically, as they re-enter their communities.

As recently reported by CBS, a reintegration program often “partners corrections with other state agencies and community nonprofits organizations to help those on probation or parole.” And by focusing on barriers like drug addiction, lack of social support and continued legal troubles, they have been finding success with the participants.

“Our approach is a prison reentry program that will help an offender return to society and become a productive member. The emphasis is placed on reducing recidivism, creating job skills, handling relationships, and creating social skills,” explained Dr. Estes.

She continued, “It is entirely about long-term solutions and success, but we do it through a highly integrative process that has shown tremendous success among those we help.”


Continue to full news report:


Learn more about Dr. Cali Estes and the work she does.

Also,check out our 30+ courses and training programs that we offer at The Addictions Academy


Addiction Enabled: 3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death Part 3

Addiction Enabled:

3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death

Part 3

Welcome to Part 3 in our 3 part series on how to know if you are enabling or loving your addict to death.

Sign 3 – You both wear a mask of denial:


Denial is the enemy of the truth. You KNOW that what I’ve talked about is a spittin’ image of your current situation, but you don’t like to admit it. You’d rather feel better and hope that your loved one will eventually just straighten out. Well, when they are in denial about their problem, as with most addicts and alcoholics in the thick of it are, and you are as well, this brings nothing but a negative outcome on both ends.

Imagine: Your daughter asks you for “food money” and you give her $100 and tell her to be careful, the rest of the money is for emergencies only. This in itself can be an emergency situation. She leaves, you worry yourself to death, wondering if she will live for another night, because you know what she’s doing, and you just supported the hell out of it. You are officially enabling her to death. Every time she goes out, it’s with your money. IF she comes back, it’s to your home. She has no worries except how easily she can get her next fix, paid for by you. You love her and want the best for her.

She is addicted to drugs and you are addicted to her.

My point is with all this: Not only to watch your own back but look out for your loved ones too. Don’t feed their addiction, don’t coddle them, don’t accept lies and excuses. Don’t feed their toxicity with more toxicity. Give them a very short time to get their shit together and get help, or make them leave your house. The results of tough love can be far less painful than the eulogy you may be writing if you don’t stop giving into someone else’s addiction.

If you want help and peace of mind, please call us at 800 706 0318 ext 1 and let us help you deal with the issues. You are not alone. Visit The Addictions Coach to see our full array of services to help you help them. Visit The Addictions Academy if  you are interested in being trained as a Nationally Certified Family Recovery Coach or Nationally Certified Recovery Coach.

Addiction Enabled: 3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death PART 2

Addiction Enabled:

3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death

Part 2



Are you the enabling mother, father, or husband or wife and you just want to help but seem to make it worse? We understand….read on and we can help you.enabling

Sign 2 – The addict lives with you, and isn’t trying to work their way into a place of their own:

Your kid or even your sister or brother, a grown adult, needs a place to stay because of whatever circumstances may have come into play. So, you let them stay with you, with the promise that they will get a job super-fast, help around the house, and keep good company. 3 days later, you have not seen them for 3 days and they have not cleaned up after himself/herself. You may even find beer bottles or needles, other paraphernalia in their room (your living room). But you clean it up and let them come back whenever they will. They are not looking for a job, but you keep taking their excuses and hoping for the best. You cannot just hope someone will get better.

They may even admit it and say they want help; they ask you just to let them stay with you until they can find help. Well, even though you cannot do everything for someone, especially what they can do for themselves, this is where you cut off the excuses and bullshit, discard it, and put something into action. You get phone numbers to treatment centers or coaches, counselors, whatever might help. Then you discuss the situation and start putting together a plan. You tell this person that they call these places, get into the program, even an intervention for starts. If they don’t accept the help, they leave. It’s hard, yes.

But if you keep allowing any addict to take advantage of a couch, a fridge, a TV, and a shower, you’re enabling them. You’re potentially enabling their death by making things easy for them, so they don’t even feel the need to get help, or so much as evaluating what they are doing with their body, with their life, with YOUR LIFE. It’s the help they can take it or leave it. The most important thing you can do in this matter is to stand your ground and keep your word. No more free ride.

This is where my job as a Family Recovery Coach comes into play. I am able to discuss their addiction with them and you as a unit. We set boundaries, we set rules and we stick to them. We literally force their only hand, which is helpful, and as a Certified Family Recovery Coach, I can help you, the family unit through the entire process.

When you deal with failure to launch, or addiction treatment issues, you want a trained professional to assess the situation, make suggestions, and most importantly get action. You need RESULTS and we get them. Check out The Addictions Coach  and if you are looking to get certified as a Nationally Certified Family Coach or Nationally Certified Recovery Coach or call us at 1.800.706.0318 ext 2

Addiction Enabled: 3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death Part 1

Addiction Enabled:

3 Signs you are Coddling Your Loved One To Death

Part 1

 loved one


This is a tough one. People die left and right of overdose from multiple controlled substances, alcohol poisoning, and many other forms of death tied to the drug world, including violence. It’s not such a predictable realm as most would think. I mean to some extent; you know for the most part that bad things can happen when you’re into bad things.


As a FAMILY RECOVERY COACH and a failure to launch expert, I get asked all the time if I think that a family member is simply supporting the addict or literally killing them. This is a very tough call and conversation to have because most of the time, it is the latter.

So, how do you know if you are helping, or killing your loved one, if you’re supporting their drug habit or being lied to? Here are a few signs that you might be an enabler, and your loved one might be taking advantage of you in order to keep their drug of choice flowing through their body. Let’s take a look at some of these.

Sign 1 – They keep asking for money, and you keep giving it to them

In this case, we’re talking addiction. Either way, giving someone what they want all the time usually isn’t healthy, unless it’s your occupation. So, let’s stick to the subject and say your son or daughter gets money from you whenever they want. You ask what it’s for, they say it’s for food, gas, or even tell you not to worry about it. For one, it’s definitely your business where your money is going. For two, if they live with you, it’s also your business what and who they are potentially bringing into your home. It’s also your business whether or not they are in danger. Take this scenario into great consideration: Your kid asks you for $50. They tell you they’re using it to get gas and go out to eat. But you know they are lying. You know they get high or drunk off the money you hand them. But you give it to them anyway. 24 hours later, you get that call that every parent fears more than anything. They’re in the hospital in critical condition or have died from an overdose or a drunken car crash. These situations are unpredictable. But there are also many things that could possibly avoid such tragic results from becoming a reality. Stop giving them money, for one. If they say it’s for gas or food, and you insist on helping them, pump the gas. Purchase the food. Even if it keeps them from going out and getting high for 1 night, even 1 hour, it’s possible that the situation might end differently, and give you a chance to talk to your loved one about getting help. If you stop the cash flow, you stop financially supporting the addiction from your end.

As a Nationally Certified Family Recovery Coach, I tell my families all the time that sometimes you need to say ‘NO’. Parents want their kids to be happy, they want them to do well and be successful. However, giving them everything they want can be costly. Failure to launch clients will always ask for money, never want to work, and ‘always be waiting on the call for an interview’. They just never seem to get it together. Does any of this sound familiar to you yet?

If it does, we are here for you. Please check out FixFailure2Launch and The Addictions Coach or if you want to become certified as a Nationally Certified Family Recovery Coach or Nationally Certified Recovery Coach.

Call our elite team at 1.800.706.0318